Reflectionist Baz's Blog

Alone I doubt/
To sort out my feelings/
The thought process is brought out/
Will I survive this mental weather?/
To wage a war/
Against the thought/
to drop down four/
And proceed to rot/
The presence of others/
Derangement of colors/
With hue arbidity/
My reflected-self/
Still remains cloudy/
Whether it’s me/
Or the ever-growing insanity/
Rain shrouds a piece of happiness/
We can never put together/
We can never possess/
In our lives full of stress/
Not one to digress I confess less//

Written by Baz 26 Mar 2006

He’s so fragile/
You’ll have to be careful around him/
You might upset him, You could anger him/
He has too many scars/
Too painful for him to show them, BUT HE WILL/
To him you’re an angel/
He acts differently towards you/
He sometimes scares you/
He, in time, repairs you/
He watches you from afar/
Too insecure from his love for you/
He doesn’t want to hurt you/
He just needs to love you/
Is that okay?/
You’re too busy to befriend him/
You’re so consumed that you’re unable/
To notice him when he’s not around/
Is that okay?/
He feels neglected/
He’s quiet around you so that the moment will last/
And permanently soak in/
He needs you to talk to him more/
Is that so insane?/
He promises to behave/
As he/
Tries not to shake/
When he stands inside your incredible love/
Is that okay?//

Written by Baz 23 Jul 2005

I have to do it

I must push through this

Will strong as stone a defender guarding gates

A quick-lipped fast quip

Equipped with the reaction of disease

As the sun goes down and sets its pink filter on the brewing storm

Our shadows touch a revolving fight

As we’re pieces you’ve set down as pawns

To hide your betrayal’s reveal

But the sky won’t meet the ocean today

For the people you take full advantage of are forever broken

Hearts you steal for yourself

Keep them close so they cannot heal

And you can think of me while you have the time of your life

Because I can’t be the only one who got the bad end of the deal

Left empty-handed there is no remedy for what you’re demanding

These feelings aren’t lonely they are spoken by everyone

And when it comes undone you’re the one with blood-drenched hands, unclean

Written by Baz

25 May 2009

And she said she couldn’t pull the trigger

Shatter the fastest sound of his heartbeat

He’s falling he’s falling and she can’t watch

She’s got the front seat

So what is she waiting for?

Crumble those things that bother you about him

The times you had your heart broken

The memories of pain and lies

Just give him release cock it

Lock it, he doesn’t mean shit so shoot him down

Because the weight you bear prevents such blue skies

Write him off and cash in on your stocks

The amount you accrued is enough to get you through

The darkest of times and what guilt is to you

Is another reason for them to see you cry

Another sip of their attention as they praise your hardships

And you always shine best

Hiding away you can never put his soul to rest

You’ve got the front seat

So what are you praying for?

Written by Baz

21 May 2009

He waits and waits for a manifested date

A trait of friendship to come forth from you

A layer of opaque equates to the earthquake

You have shaken deep in the walls of his heart

Pressure is not wanted but still it shakes

So call and prepare defenses

Picket fences you can’t commiserate

Or show and require false pretenses

Like a locked door your solitude obscures

When friends ask you aren’t sure

Because in your heart you know you’re impure

As cold as the crisp dealings

A sight through smell of your past feelings

Bent lens and bent view

The broken may stay broken

But you can’t keep walking in his shoes

When you fall short on courage and fail to show your face

And you just can’t stop criticizing his restitution

The tiny fractions of your actions

Pro-active only to the path you safeguard and embrace

Words sprawled across the paper thick with paint

Look in the mirror because there’s no room to hesitate

When it comes to life and death every second you have you procrastinate

Written by Baz

14 May 2009

Yeah,you love it because its so dark/
So sick and full of the maple tree bark/
Bitter to taste but too graceful to waste/
Hold onto it and embrace/
Our bodies were expired when we arrived/
And the ship has fallen before we were alive/
So don’t deny it just let it ignite/
Shit i don’t know anymore/
This life is a test and i get bad scores/
Let the waves crash in -the waste splash in/
The pain of payment and the repaying of debt/
Lead to the lifelong walk- exact same spot/
We are caught in this long-shot over-bought cost of naught/
Fuck it i guess i lost again/
Another taste of what will never be in the end/
For days and days i prayed we could be a cure/
Pure/
I’m understanding to what I’ve got/
The line is drawn and what do you have anymore?/
A worthless call, a RR track and a worthless roommate/
No wonder why you always procrastinate/
Time will tell who will drown in hell/
And you will be caught in his flames just as well/
My heads caught in the noose with you my knife I try to get loose/
But his head is caught too/
You ripple shattered throughout me and everyone involved/
A promotion to the queen of what hate sells/
There is a resolve there is a breakpoint of confession/
In the memory of fantasy addresses/
Meeting internet after internet a pixel of meaning/
That has more substance in the chase than the being/
Recede the waves and nothing is played/
But a memory of how we strayed//

Written by Baz

07 Apr 2009